Countdown to the Wedding

My daughter is getting married on November 5, 2011. That's 7 months from today. Just under 31 weeks. Exactly 214 days. I'm happy about the wedding. I'm thrilled with the man she's going to marry. It's going to be an exciting and jubilant time. I am, however, NOT happy about my weight right now. I want to feel that I look good at my daughter's wedding. And more importantly, I want to FEEL better on that happy day and for many, many days after. So I am embarking on an attempt to lose 25 pounds before November 5, 2011.

I admit that I've let myself go. I've gotten lazy and haven't kept up with eating right and exercising. But today I need to make a change. I've done this before. Thirteen years ago, I lost 40 pounds. It took me about six months. So 25 pounds in about the same amount of time is possible. I know that there are lots of diet plans out there. Last time I did Herbalife, a program of dietary supplements along with decreasing caloric intake. It was very regimented and involved taking many pills throughout the day. It worked well for me. But this time I need to make life changes. I can't just lose the weight by my target date and then go back to life as usual. I'm older now and I believe that these changes need to be made so that my quality of life will remain as good as possible as I go into the middle of my life. My plan includes exercise and proper eating. The exercise part is pretty easy. Willie, my dog, is there every morning encouraging me to hook him up to his harness and leash and get outside for a walk. I commit to Willie a one-hour walk every day. In addition to that, I plan to get back to the gym so that I can tone up with weights. I actually look forward to the elliptical trainer and the treadmill. I know that I will feel so much better the more I exercise. The proper eating part is going to be considerably harder. I love food, all kinds of food. And my husband is a superb cook. We have fantastic food in our house all the time. I also love sweets. Put a chocolate cake on the table and I my will-power goes out the window. So this part will be much harder for me. I need to consider everything I eat. How much am I eating? Why am I eating it? Am I using this food as a comfort? How will I feel after I've eaten? And, most importantly, will eating this help me reach my goal? I need to remember, too, that the wedding is the target date for losing the weight, but the ultimate goal is to be healthier and be able to live a fuller life. I've always believed that the more you do the more you can do. Now is the time to start living that belief.

Seven Lessons from My Dog

1. Greet people with enthusiam.

When I come home, my dog Willie is at the door ready to greet me. Whether I've been gone for a quick trip to the store or a four day trip out of town, he's excited to see me and shows his excitement by twirling around. After I've taken off my jacket and put my purse away, I sit and hold him and pet him. We greet each other with enthusiam.

This is how I need to greet people. Everyone is special and should be told that as they come through the door. I don't know how many days I will get with the special people in my life. I need to make sure they know that they are important to me. Greeting them with enthusiam is one way I can do that.

2. Exercise wholeheartedly.

Willie is ready to walk for me at any time of any day. He walks in the rain or in the dark. He walks around the block or for 5 miles on a hiking trail. It makes no difference to him. He puts his heart into every walk. He seems to instinctively know that getting out and exercising is good for him.

I need to greet my exercise routine with the same heart. Whether its walking, lifting weights or running on the treadmill, each opportunity to exercise is a chance to stay healthy and young. I'm not kidding myself about having the body of a 24 year old. I'm no longer 24 years old and that body is long gone. I need to exercise so that I will be able to keep up as I age. Exercise is just good for me.

3. Play with abandon.

When I throw the ball or play tug-of-war with Willie, he gives it his all and nothing else exists right then. He chases leaves and squirrels the same way. When he is playing, he's enjoying himself and anyone else who's playing with him. For Willie, play is an important part of living.

I sometimes forget to play. When worktime is over, I want to sit and relax. I forget that play is also relaxing. Play is good for the heart and a way to bond with others. When we first adopted Willie, my husband played with Willie more than I did. One day, Willie and I were alone. He was six-months old and full of energy, so I started playing with him. That playtime seemed to bond us together in a new way. There was nothing but me and him and the game. I was laughing at him. He appeared to be laughing at me. We gave the game our all and it was a good thing.

4. Be quick to forgive.

I have noticed that if I accidently step on Willie, after he yelps in pain, he runs to me and tries to lick my face or hand. He is forgiving me. Right away. No accusations. No fault-finding. Just putting things right between us, before I've even had a chance to react and apologize.

Why don't I do that? Why must I analyze and try to figure out what to do and what to say? Why do I have to decide whether I'm at fault more than the other person? Just put things right. Apologize quickly, even if the fault isn't mine. It may not be this time, but it probably will be next time. And the people in my life are more important to me than being right.

5. Gather information from all sources until you make a decision.

I've watched Willie when we go to a new place. He sniffs things out and gathers as much information as possible. He looks in all the corners of all the rooms with his nose to the ground. If we come home and someone has come over during our absence, he can tell right away and starts sniffing until he can find the visitor.

I tend to be quick to jump to conclusions. I've gotten into a lot of trouble because of this tendency. I know that knowledge is power and that there are many sides to every story. I need to wait for more information before I decide what's what. Sniff things out and look everywhere for answers.

6. Treat everyone the same.

Whether young or old, rich or poor, Willie treats everyone the same. He's friendly and accepting. If you are not as friendly as he is, he will keep trying to win you over.

Everyone is deserving of a friendly smile. The kind word that I give today could mean the difference between a sucky day or a good day for someone. And the person who looks like they have it all together may be the person who needs it the most.

7. Be empathetic.

Willie has the ability to tell what kind of mood I'm in. If I'm having a bad day or crying about something sad in my life, he jumps in my lap and starts licking my face, as if to say "It'll be okay." If I'm happy or upbeat, he picks up on that too and is ready to rejoice with me.

People want their feelings to be acknowledged and validated. I may not be able to solve the problems of those around me, but I have found that resolution isn't what people want from me anyway. They want to be heard. They want an ear and a shoulder when faced with the problems of life. They want to share good news with someone who with be excited for them. Jump up and down and give a high-five when all is right with the world.

It's a Dog's Life

Consider the life of the average family dog. Sure, there are shots at the vet, trips to the groomer and hours of loneliness while his "people" are away at work. But it is a pretty good life over all. Right now, for example, my dog is laying on a soft blanket at my feet. He has his food delivered to him each morning, he gets plenty of exercise and all the petting and scratching behind the ears he can take. In the winter, he lays under the covers and in the summer we make sure the temperature in the house is comfortable. He's got a bowl of water both inside and outside. He has a basket full of toys and when we accidentally drop food on the floor, it's all his.

The best part about being a dog is that there is freedom from care and concern about the issues of the day. I came home the other day, tired and keyed up. I was greeted by my dog. He was exurburant and genuinely thrilled to see me. He ran and got a toy from his basket and insisted that we play. There was no thought about tiredness or worry about any issue facing me. There was just joy and comradery. He said "You're home!!! I'm so thrilled to see you!! Now we will play and everything will be good!" A dog lives in the moment and any moment is a good moment if there is a toy to throw and a companion to throw it.

Come to think of it, that is a great life lesson.