Friendship

Six or seven years ago, I met someone new at church and we became friends. She owned a florist then and my youngest daughter started working for her part-time after school and on weekends. When my daughter was getting ready to go off to college, my friend asked if I knew anyone who would want to take my daughter's place at the shop. I told that I would. I knew nothing about flowers or the retail business. But I knew that this friend was a kind, gentle, caring person and I wanted to get to know her better and be around her more.

That decision is one of the best decisions I've ever made. I started working the weekend before Mother's Day, which was a trial-by-fire experience in the floral world. I worked for her until that Christmas, when she decided to close her shop. But those eight months brought us closer together than we expected. Since it was a small business - 3 employees and the owner - we spent a lot of time together. There were times when we were very busy. But there were times when it was relatively quiet. During those quiet times, we would talk. We talked about anything and everything. We solved the problems of the world. We joked. We laughed. We cried. We worked and talked. We sat and ate lunch and talked. She says that I was there for her during a critical time in her life because while I worked for her, she decided to close her shop and then did close her shop. I helped her think it out and grieve over the loss of the customers she had come to know and love. But as is always true in a friendship, she was also there for me at a critical time. My youngest daughter went off to school, our nest was empty and she allowed me to voice some of my thoughts and feelings about that. My other daughter had gotten married and she allowed me to voice some of my thoughts and feelings about that.

When her shop closed and we realized that we wouldn't be seeing each other on a regular basis, we came to the conclusion that we wanted our friendship to be given the opportunity to continue to flourish. So we made a pact that we would get together once a week for dinner. She moved about an hour from where I live, but we have kept that pact. Every week she drives down so that we can meet together. And we talk and laugh and cry. She listens while I talk about whatever is going on in my life and I listen while she talks about whatever is going on in her life. She gives me perspective and I give her perspective.

Friendships are important and I have many good, good friends. They take time and they take commitment. Friendships don't grow if you don't keep them going. It has to be a conscious effort. You need to decide to be a friend. I'm glad I decided to be a friend to my friend, Wendy.