Sunday, January 27, 2013

If You Want My Advice #8

Make sure that some of your best friends are younger than you.

We all need fresh eyes and new perspective.  We start to think that our way of doing things is the only way of doing things.  We get set in our ways and get into ruts that are impossible to get out of.  But when we associate with younger people, either by a couple of years or many years, we see the world in a new and different light.  We see that our way isn't the only way.  We see that our perspective is just one perspective. 

I have a friend who is nine years old.  She has a hope-filled look at life that I think I once had.  Her joy and excitement are contagious and when I've spent time with her, I walk away with that same excitement.  She helps me not to take myself too seriously and see things as new and thrilling.  When we go someplace, everything is new in her eyes.  The zoo is gives us something new to learn.  A restaurant gives us something new to eat.  Once we went for ice cream.  She added gummi bears to her cup of ice cream and as she would take each bite, she would try to guess what color was the gummi bear in that bite.  With excitement she would pull the bear out of her mouth to see if she was right.  And she was ALWAYS excited, even if she was wrong.  For her, everything is a thrill.  What a wonderful perspective to have!!   

I have a friend who is twenty-one years old.  She's new in her job and just finished getting her college degree.  She thinks of paying off her school loans and getting a promotion.  She reminds me what it is to struggle, but to look ahead with certainty that everything will work out.  She asks for advice but also asks for confirmation that she's on the right track.  I know that she will make her own path, just like I did.  I know that she will do her best to do the right thing for herself.  She has her life in front of her and she takes that seriously.  She undoubtably will make a few mistakes along the way, but each step is hers to make.   

I have a friend who is fifteen or so years younger than I am and still raising kids.  I see her consistency and firmness with her children.  I see myself in her sometimes, as she hopes that she's being the right kind of mom.  But I also see that she will have no regrets, because she understands that she is doing the best she can with what she has been given and with who she is right now.  Some days it's all she can do to just put one foot in front of the other, to do the next thing, whatever that thing is.  And she does, because there is no other alternative.  Her job is hugely important.  She recognizes that and she's up to the task. 

All of these friends of mine help me to keep a young perspective.  I'm able to look at the world through their eyes and realize that I don't have to have all of the answers all the time.  Most days I'm not even sure of the question.  But I know that I get so much more from my young friends than any of them could possibly know.  I love and appreciate each of them for their uniqueness and for how they keep me young. 

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